Ep. 118. “Across the Sea”: Two Guys and Their Overbearing Mother

Sorry everybody but I didn’t get to watch Lost this week, instead I’ll be talking about an entirely different show about this crazy lady and her twin boys on an island… oh wait a minute… well I just found out from my Admin (girlfriend) that this was Lost after all. This episode easily threw me for a loop. What did this have to do with the show? Was it necessary? And why with only two more episodes remaining do you decide now is the right time for this story? Well might as well jump right into the episode.

Right at the beginning we are introduced to a brand new character, Claudia, who is a dark olive skinned Mediterranean woman, she is ship wrecked and ends up on the island. On the beach we learn she is smuggling watermelons underneath her incredible long dress (trust me it will play out later in the story.) when she is saved by Question Lady (we know this because she states to Claudia, “Every question will lead to another question.”) and go to her cave. Well it turns out that she doesn’t have watermelons at all, but babies! With the help of Question Lady, she gives birth (see the long dress hid all this birth part.) to the whitest twin boys ever (seriously she’s Mediterranean.) and names one Jacob before Question lady kills her. The other is never named (but by this point we’re sure it’s going to be the smoke monster.) and has to lead a life of people skirting around ever calling him anything.

Both boys soon grow up into young lads, who also happen to be the biggest mama’s boys in the world, but nameless soon grows into a disenfranchised youth. As an act of “screw you!” for killing her, Claudia returns to nameless as a ghost/jedi thing and tells him that she is his real mother and that there are other people on the island and shows him their location. Soon nameless leaves the home, his mother (Question Lady) and Jacob, who is now officially the biggest mama’s boy ever on television.

We jump a head to 30 years later where we learn that nameless is living with his people, while Jacob has become a voyuer and still lives with his mother (surprise, surprise). Nameless wants off the island, but mama puts a stop to that by trying to cave in his skull. She decides that Jacob now must take the place of guardian of the island and makes him do the cup thing from the next two episodes. Question Lady leave Jacob to find nameless, who kills her with a wicked knife he’s been playing with the entire episode, but there is one thing you don’t do to a guy with a Oedipus complex and now god powers and that’s kill his mama. In an odd act he takes nameless to the cave of doom and some how he’s changed into the smoke monster. Jacob lays the two dead bodies to rest where we get the only appearance of any of the other major characters… in flashback… the main characters aren’t even in the third episode to the end. WHAT’S UP WITH THAT!!!

It was an alright episode I guess, a bit corny, but okay. It’s just that this is so weird to be in this order, and it didn’t feel like what I’ve seen of Lost so far. I mean was this episode that important, couldn’t we just know that there are higher powers working on the island than to just show them like this. I know I’m not watching them in order so many of you maybe yelling at what I find odd about this one, but really did we need it? Well that’s enough for now, hopefully the next one will be better. Later for now. Kyle.

Ep. 119. “What They Died For”: Who will be Jeff Probst?

One more episode in and I maybe even more confused that the last post. Though it was much easier to keep track of this episode since it’s about an hour and half shorter than the last. So let us jump right in and dig into Episode 119.

For the penultimate episode of the series we begin with Dr. Party of Five (Jack) in the other world noticing his weird cut in a mirror before his creepy son sneaks up on him. Together they have breakfast with a pregnant Clair of Sugar Bran (which sounds like the grossest cereal ever), before we jump back to Dr. P.O.F.’s group of Kate, Sawyer, and Chubs on the island, the good doctor is patching up Kate from a bullet wound that luckily went through (but patching up will hurt). They realize they must kill Locke”ness” monster (even though in this episode he’s like unstoppable) and find Desmond “The most important man in the universe”.

After a cut back to the other world Desmond is watching Locke all voyeur style before Ben recognizes him and yells at him, Desmond “T.M.I.M.I.T.U” then gets out of the vehicle and beats the everliving crap out of poor lonely Ben (why does everyone hate him so?). Luckily the Ben on the island fixes not having friends by having C4 to blow up the plane (The same plane they fix and then get off the island with!?!).

In Ben’s shack they meet with Chuck and Zoe (who are killed later) but they realize that the Locke”ness” monster is coming (cue Jaws music, seriously it sounds very close). Batmanuel goes out to talk to Locke”ness” but he “smokes” his ass, Locke”ness” wants Ben (less lonely, but he’s a monster, or god or something). If Ben does what Locke”ness” says and kills some people (Chuck wasn’t really included but Ben kills him anyway) he’ll give him the island. The two then go off to find Desmond “T.M.I.M.I.T.U” in a well, also he’s important because he has resistance to electromagnetism.

Other world Desmond though goes to the police to turn himself in (seriously there is three characters right in the holding cells and Sawyer is the officer), he confesses to hitting Locke with his car, but it’s all a ruse to get to Kate and Sayid. Chubs bribes the officer (Michelle Rodriguez) when they are being taken to real prison and they break up into two man groups.

Dr. P.O.F.’s group though comes across Jacob all Survivor style with the fire and everything, one of them is going to get to be like him (seriously this is like if on Survivor they come to the fire and Jeff Probst tells them that one of them needs to be Jeff Probst, who will be Jeff Probst?). After no one really wants it Dr. P.O.F. takes the role, he drinks water and puff he’s like him (Jacob even says so). He’s told his mission and he’s ready to fight Lock”ness”. During that time Ben and Locke”ness” arrive at Desmond “T.M.I.M.I.T.U”‘s well, but he isn’t there. End of Episode.

My question for this episode was “Why do they want to blow up the plane!?!” Which my admin (girlfriend) was kind enough to answer for me. I’m was so lost here, this is the same plane that they will fly off into the sunset with, but during this episode that bastard is going down with C4. It was a good episode, but every couple of minutes there was something that made me question everything I knew from before, I hope I continue to get some more answers. Onward to episode 118!

Ep. 120/121. “The End” : Why is Ben so Lonely?

Well, my search for answers were not completed in the least. I may be more confused than to begin with, and there are a ton of things I have no clue about, but before I get into that I’ll start at the beginning of the end.

We open with Dr. Party of Five’s (Jack) father’s coffin, which is arriving by plane in a world that seems normal and not an island (which I was lead to believe to be a main thing in this show). Before I know it though, we are whisked away to said island (get use to that, it happens like a million times in this episode) and we met Dr. Party of Five knee deep in water, he tells the group that they must go to the bamboo forest to get to the heart of the island, so they set off for Mt. Doom… I mean that heart of the island thing.

In what I thought was the real world (but was mistaken) we see Chubs (Hugo) and Sayid in a yellow hummer talking about him being in prison (which is the second person to mention that), Chubs leaves and goes to shoot a hobbit in the ass with a tranquilizer gun before we return to the island.

It’s here that I learn that this character Desmond is like the most important person ever, though no one tells me why. Is he a weapon? An instrument of good? I still don’t know, he really only had to move a damn rock. Though both Dr. Party of Five and the Locke”ness” monster both want him for their master plans.

Back in the other world (I’ll call it that for now) everyone is meeting up and remembering their past lives on the island together. It seems when they touch each other and are doing something familiar to a clip that they have on hand they go to full flashback mode. We also learn that they must all meet up for something they have planned as everyone says vaguely that they must do that.

On the island Batmanuel and another guy come across a crazy chick shooting at them, she is Claire and she tells them she is too crazy to leave (or something like that). While Dr. P.O.F. comes across Locke”ness” monster’s group with Desmond “the most important man in the universe”, they both realize they have the same agenda and leave together to the cave of doom. At the bamboo forest they break into a group of three with Locke”ness”, Dr. P.O.F. and Desmond for the rest of the trip, which results in the island in full destruction mode.

This is were things seem to pick up as there is literally ten different story lines going on at the same time, to even try and talk about them all is insane, my mind will explode if I tried. What you need to know is that everyone meets up in the other world after they remember and hold a funeral for (themselves?), a small group take off in a plane, Dr. P.O.F. fights Locke”ness” and ultimately saves the island but at the cost of his life, and a small group of Chubs, Ben, and Desmond “T.M.I.M.I.T.U” are left on the island, also Chubs is like a god or something.

Well that was the last episode, I have no clue to what happened. It wasn’t bad, just I was as confused as hell (which maybe where they ended up, I’m still a little confused as to that). There are still a lot of questions i have though, so as part of this blog I’ll ask my admin (girlfriend) a single question that I have that isn’t too important to the show for her to answer each post, which I asked “what the hell was with the ending”, to which she replied with an article from the creators with their version of the ending (still a little vague for my taste). I’ll close this post with some of the other questions that I have as well, you may comment, but I will not be reading them, my admin (girlfriend) will be reading them. So post away.

1. Why is Clair so crazy and shooting at people?

2.Why has so many of the character seem to have done hard time in prison? (Kate and Sayid)

3. Why is Dr. P.O.F and Chubs like gods of the island, but seem to have like zero special powers? (seriously Dr. P.O.F. still sweats a ton)

4. Was that plane there the entire time? and why did it only take like ten minutes to fix it?

5. Why is Desmond the most important person in the universe?

6. What was the deal with the other world?

7. What was up with the random couple and the dog just hanging out in a shack in the middle of the damn island? That they built in 1975 but still seems fine today?

8. Where did Locke”ness” get a boat? and why did the ladder just seem to end before it was anywhere near the water and said boat?

9. What was up with the cave and that rock?

10. Why is Ben o’ so lonely?

So This is How it Started…

This is me, my name is Kyle and I’m pretty much a Lost virgin, sure I’ve heard about it, and know a couple of plot points from hearing about it from people who watch it, but I’ve never really had any interest in watching it when it premiered.

Though after it a was out it may have been a show that I would watch, but due to my schedule at the time I just couldn’t, and that’s how Lost lost me. Well it’s over now, and that is when I decided to jump on the bandwagon (you know, as people are getting off), but I didn’t want to just watch it like a normal person, I wanted the answer first (because I hear there is a lot of questions) so I’m going to start at the end and go backwards. I’ll be watching from the end (my beginning?) to the first episode (my ending?) and trying to figure out this show in reverse.

So I hope you enjoy my adventure and maybe you can enjoy the show Lost for a while longer as a newcomer asks many of the same questions you may have had, but only in reverse.